CRETIN: /kret'in/, /kree'tn/, n.
Congenital loser; an obnoxious person; someone who can't do anything right

CONCRETIN: /kahn'kret'in/, /kahn'kree'tn/, n.
Cretin who loves to skate concrete

Monday, June 26, 2006

KILLIN' it in DaVille

Dew Tour Day 4

It can't get any better than Day 3 right? WRONG!

We had another mega session downtown. Carla didn't join JOn and I, but Mofo and Skidzilla did, with KidCretins in tow. It was fun to watch them cruise around on the long board tandem skydiver style, but REALLY funny watching Jon freak out and chase after them when they bombed the sidewalk hill! Go Jon Go! (no children were harmed during this experience) We all had great runs and Kyle SAID the concrete felt weird after riding his home ramp so much, but it didn't show. He even brought out NewRampGnar with a big half cab ollie 360 rock thing... it was cool and dialed. Mofo.

So being the freak that I am I insist on leaving in PLENTY of time to get to the tour early so we can get those front row VIP seats. It was SO cool walking in while civilians were waiting for them to officially open the venue. But the hilarious part was the dude snappin' a pic of us as if we were someone important but he wasn't sure who-better get a pic just in case. I guess the Concretins really are famous! Sorry dude, just some old dudes who are old enough to know better.

We get our seats - and get shuffled in and out of them several times for "Panasonic VIPs." Woo hoo... damn corporate sponsors... JUST KIDDING! We got moved 3 seats over... STILL way better seats than the Mayor had! (though he only showed for 5 minutes to present a trophy). He's obviously not into action sports, BUT let's hope he's listening when we say DO WHAT NEEDS TO BE DONE TO BRING BACK THE TOUR EVERY YEAR, and while you're at it, PLEASE get us some shade at the park. We're cookin' out there man! (Dave Duncan also commented that they hope to bring the tour back here next year, as this year was SOOO much better than last.) Well done Louisville.

We watch some serious tricks and mega crashes during the BMX finals. DMC came charging off the side at Mach3, and I think he actually tried to peg grind the sponsor sign, but I can't be sure. He was ok. The scariest bail included a bike landing upright across a dudes face on the flat. I just knew he just took a crank to the face, but he didn't as his face had just enough room between the ramp and the bike. Had to be a frightful view though. Jon is right, these guys deserve respect. They put their bodies on the line.

Flyin' High!

Kagy X'n it up!

Then it was time for the MAIN EVENT! Skate Vert Finals! Kyle played it cool, but I think he agreed that it was super cool that "Bucky Lasek is RIGHT THERE." I warned him and Jon both that I would likely annoy them with my enthusiasm, hope I didn't, but I probably did. Sorry guys, but given this weekend, it isn't likely to change anytime soon. Steve-O rolled in civilian style with the all elusive Leah. She does exist! 'Twas a pleasure to meet you! Hope you make more appearances with the Concretins in the future!

She does exist!

We watched the pros throw down in practice for over an hour. We would have thought you wouldn't see any better skating than that already. But we were wrong. VERY wrong. Tas skated angry and took a slam that knocked him out of a shoe. Actually he took a couple heavy slams, but when he was on, he was skying! PLG was super tech, but didn't seem to be having fun either. Same for Dufour and Furlong, but Furlong had the burliest madonna that always ended with a gigantic POW on the tail... simply awesome. Newcomer Jean Postec was putting on a kickflip class, but he too seemed like he was at work, not play. Everyone else, even when they had problems and frustrations, got back up and the next trick they landed, the fun was back on their faces. Lincoln landed just about everything in practice, but bailed on both of his runs, but he always had a smile on his face. Lorifice, Ringstrom, and Hendrix all had full runs and landed everything they had planned to-I can't list everything, it was crazy I tell you. Check the DewTour site. As much fun as it was to watch, and unbelievable, it wasn't enough... HUH? That's because Bucky, Bob, and Andy are so far out of sane, that the rest of us are just a tiny spec on the shores of sanity. Andy's always tech but scientifically precise run FINALLY got recognition, when it looked like he struggled with it!! He ALMOST missed several grabs and sketched on several landings, but he pulled everything!! The crowd, all too often silent, went nuts. Bucky put the pressure on himself to make a killer 2nd run and absolutely killed it! His channel gap tailslide actually was a bit of a grind, but no worries. And by leaving out the "flick" he stayed on and completed his run.

Don't skate angry!

Furlong - Gnar ON!

Hendrix - East coast ripper! Full run.

But Bob's first run finally got the switch recognition he has deserved for SO many years. Switch roll in, switch ollies and airs, stale 540, eggplant revert on the extension, switch kickflip fakie on the roll-in, and some funky grind revert, just could not be beat. Suprisingly it was clear to the audience, but more importantly to the judges. Bob takes home the Louisville Slugger from the Panasonic Open, engraved with the words Skateboard Vert Champion.

F I N A L L Y ! Congratulations Bob!!

We hang around for a long time for the award presentation, so I can congratulate Bucky and Bob, again, and finally get the Lil'Bucky and Lil'Bob photos. Thanks for being such gracious athletes and inspirations to so many. Mofo and Jon, simply stood back and laughed at me, but of course they took the opportunity to get an autograph when we had to pass Bob on the way out... that makes me smile.

So... Dew Tour over... skate life insanity done... WRONG AGAIN! In the hall, Jon confirmed that Chris Miller (!) and Tony Mag were "probably gonna check it out," meaning the park... We head out and I am floating I'm so stoked. Mofo ditches us at my house to go watch his friends band jam nearby. He calls us and says they haven't even shown up yet, so we bail on him and head immediately to the park... Sorry Jason, we'll get a chance to see you play again soon I'm sure. We arrive, actually pretty quick compared to what I imagine the pros could do... so we skate. We stick around the deep end as that is where the pros would likely play, and it wasn't as stupid crowded there... After about a 20 minute wear out session, up walks Miller, and Macdonald! It was ON! TonyMag had joined them, but with a bum arm, he wasn't gonna skate. He was visibly bummed as he walked around the park and commented on how fun it looked. I hope the ladies kept him company and didn't annoy him. He even commented on the GhettoGrip camera handle. Yea, I was stoked.

I talked to a 17 year old kid working as a consultant and writer for AOL and their new sports web. How crazy is that? 17 years old... bugger! And someone even asked about the Concretin shirts!! Yep, we really ARE famous! Well, we should be at least a little famous considering all the blog cards I gave out over the course of the event!! :) To those of you reading this with said cards, THANK YOU! Drop us an email or a comment, and check back for weekly updates on the adventures of the 'Cretins. (And don't worry, updates usually aren't this lengthy...)

Miller and MacDonald padded up and unpacked their Gnar, then unleashed it on the 'crete. Chris had to "figure it out" first, but with smokin' grinds and super speed in his first few runs, he seemed pretty comfortable already. I tried to get some good footage, but found myself in the way all too often. I apologized profusely to them as I almost got my hat taken off by a frontside air out of the pipe... I watched their lines and finally figured out where I could move into and out of position to let 'em skate without worry. (I don't think they were worried, but I was.) They were so cool to everyone in the crowd, and graciously signed autographs when the groms got up the nerve to ask, which 1 always lead to 10(8 of which were NOT groms)... but everyone seemed to understand they were there to skate and would only come up every 20 minutes or so. Miller is insane with control and flow. He absolutely killed the pipe near 11:00, multiple times, frontside and backside, and then aired out for the fun of it. He missed the big frontside 9' to 11' hip transfer, so Andy chased him into it and he crossed at least 6 feet more than he did last year, and stuck it! Paul, our doubles run has a LONG way to go...

Hey Chris! What time is it?

He's blending in, but believe me... he's there!

As the pros rested, I decided I needed to show that I was a fan, but I knew how to skate too. DumbAss... I actually CAN do a deepend line, but for some reason I did a manual at 9:00 in the pipe, tried to stay on, and ended up taking a shoulder slam in the bottom of the pipe. If I hadn't been wearing a helmet, lights out. The only cool thing is that it's ON TAPE! Wow... OW... I'm still extremely sore from it, but my head isn't aching like I thought it would. I sat down for a few minutes, and then demonstrated that I CAN in fact skate without stupidity and even threw in a rock-n-roll for good measure. Then I showed that I'm smart and de-padded. I obviously can't handle the Miller and Macdonald gnar remnants left on the 'crete...

Do your part to save the lame... learn CPR. Thank you.

Having rested maybe 10 minutes, Andy needed a challenge. Apparently, skating since 3:00, and winning 3rd place wasn't enough. So he started working on a line to hit the waterfall hips... 4 times in a single run... 11' to 9' hip, hip to 4', hip to 9', wall, hip to 4', hip back far enough to go into the 11'... W H A T ! ! ! Yea, he has gnar. When competing with seriously gifted mortals, 3rd place is certainly fair, considering it is obvious Andy is a MACHINE! As the light went away (there were some bulbs out on the stadium lighting, so the cam footage was getting progressively worse) I finally decided to just sit back and watch and enjoy. It's hard sometimes, because I want to share that joy, but if you weren't there, I just can't. No amount of footage will convey the energy and excitement. I can only hope this super skating transfered to tape half as well as it transferred to the 'crete.

Frontside slidin' and rockin'! Leave some gnar for the rest of us! We need it!

It was fun to watch and I cannot thank them enough for allowing me and so many civilians to invade their session. Everyone else will have to wait for the next LT video... coming in November? Perhaps...

*dream sequence - end scene*


  • At 1:10 PM, Blogger gimpinainteasy said…

    Damn Nick. Great Job !! I'm gonna post some pics now too.

  • At 1:38 PM, Blogger Nikoli said…

    The cool thing about those last 4 pics... they're vid captured pics... so you know the footage is insane (and hilarious in regards to my slam)... Can't wait to have 2 views of the runs with your footage Jon!

  • At 10:45 PM, Blogger OMP said…

    Awsome report Nick!
    You're right...I wish I could have been there. The pics are excellent, and it sounds like the pros were havin' a blast too.

    See you on the Crete soon!


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